Sunday, May 1, 2011

The Date

     It was a dark and stormy night.
     Actually, it was daytime. It was also mid-afternoon, and sunny. There was not a cloud in the sky. It's funny how clichè certain beginning phrases in a story can be.
     Anyhow, it was a bright and sunny afternoon, and a momentous occasion for a certain individual. This individual was Mark.
     As he looked in the mirror, preparing for his big night, he debated trifling changes in his appearance. Mark was a handsome young man, appearing to be of Russian descent. His porcelain skin glinted in the sunlight cascading in through his window panes. His soft blue eyes twinkled as he turned back and forth, adjusting his tuxedo before his eyes, practicing the poses he would strike and the attractive expressions he would put on his face should a camera come strolling by. Finally, he turned to walk out of the room just before remembering that pants are generally expected to be worn in public. Though Mark was a very smart young man, and of great intellect, he got distracted very easily.
     One more look in the mirror and he was ready to go. His muscular limbs stripped his outfit off, carelessly throwing it against his wall, quickly replacing them with a muscle shirt and athletic shorts. Running, he decided, was much more important than fashion.
     Mark bolted out the door into the humid Spring air of West Town. He breathed in deeply, inhaling the smells of nearby bakeries on Grand Avenue, the smell of a far away chocolate factory, breathing in the sounds of passing dog-walkers and musicians practicing, and sucking in the dreary sight of the treeless street. This was home. Though, it could be made better. A person standing nearby would have been astounded by the sounds and smells of West Town, but with little to no trees, the image was certainly not complete. It needed change.
     However, change was simply a figment of Mark's thoughts at that moment, as they were mostly concerning not tripping over his newly-grown legs. Though a senior in High School, Mark was a late-bloomer, and he was only just getting used to his new height and strength.
     Mark took a tour of his neighborhood, starting at his place of residence and working his way around the block. He passed houses that had been sitting where they were for approximately a century, and ones that had just been built and looked like something out of an old 20th Century sci-fi movie. On his jog, Mark ran alongside children playing in their not-yards and kids flying kites in their not-parks. Amidst his passing thoughts about sweating up a storm and how it would ruin his carefully perfected scent that night, Mark thought about how much the neighborhood was lacking, for all it had. If there were a touch of greenery in some places, everything would seem that more vibrant. And we know how great it is to be vibrant!
     As Mark returned home and dashed upstairs, said hello to his mother and father, tousled his little sister's hair, and pet his dog as she attempted to tackle him to the floor, though in a friendly way...Then he strutted over to his room. Yes, he strutted. He did not walk, skip, hop, nor did he jump, but he strutted off to his room and changed back into his fancy clothing. He had an amazing girlfriend with whom he was infinitely in love with, and they were on their way to become Prom King and Queen. Life could not have been better.
      After a re-examination and several frantic showers to allay the sweaty scent from running, Mark hopped into his car and drove off into the tree-less neighborhood of West Town. After picking up his date, Rosemary, he drove to his High School Prom, chatting with her all the way.
     The dance itself was fantastic.
     Everyone in Mark's grade was there. The decorations were phenomenal, and the music was loud and invigorating. Every time a photographer passed them by, Mark and Rosemary stuck a pose. It turned out that Mark's poses in front of the mirror actually came in handy! Though, what he didn't know was that Rosemary had been practicing as well...
     In any case, when they were called up to give their acceptance speeches, they strode up with style. While up on the platform, Mark scanned the crowd. He saw all the teenagers with their dates looking up at him and started sweating profusely. Mark was still nervous as he approached the microphone. As he took it in hand, one adult in the room recognized him. It was his alderman.
     During Mark's speech, he mentioned growing up in his neighborhood without any trees or greenery of any kind. Then he went into the normal jargon that a teen fills his speech with, but with style!
     Afterwords, he received much applause. "They LOVE me!" he thought with surprise. He hadn't practiced enough, in his opinion, but his speech went over very well. After Rosemary's speech, they stepped down from the raised platform and Mark's alderman approached the couple.
     He first said, "Wow, I'm very impressed with your speech, Mark! Very professional!"
     "Yeah, I spent TONS of time on it!", he muttered under his breath.
     "What's that?"
     "Oh, nothing! You were saying about me being great?"
     "Oh, right! Excellent speech! I was particularly moved by the section on the paucity of greenery in West Town. I've taken it upon myself to add trees and other shrubbery to your neighborhood! That should fix the problem, don't you think?"
     Mark thought he was dreaming. "That would be amazing," he said, "but how can that happen?"
     "I'm the alderman..." was the quick reply.
     Shortly thereafter, trees were added to West Town, making the aesthetic view of the neighborhood much more convivial and eco-friendly. After this, Mark was able to jog with Rosemary feeling satisfied that he'd done something right. And why shouldn't he? He got the girl and made a difference.

1 comment:

  1. This story is so cozy and lovely. The only error I see is maybe a little too much "chatting" with the reader in the beginning. While it's nice to make the reader feel comfortable with the style of writing in which you are introducing, you don't want it to make it seem like you are talking to them. There are a few other incidents where this happens, but that can be fixed.

    A personal opinion, the ending seemed kinda out of place (Well, when he kissed his mom and dad). I don't know many teens who do that in today's society, but that's just me. Excellent story. :D

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